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AudiobookTwenty years into her marriage, Kat and her husband faced head-on the great underlying fear of most monogamous people: My partner wants to have sex with other people. For them, that truth led to a rollercoaster of new sexual and romantic adventures...
Would people still take us seriously? What if we're trying to run in serious polyamory circles that frown on casual sex? As much as I want to fully embrace my sexy slut self, I still have some serious discomfort around the word.
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As I watched Flick pack the afternoon before he left, I started to feel the pangs as it really hit me that he was going on this adventure without me. It felt really weird that he was going to be having big new experiences on this trip with someone else.
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What's tricky is that even in a group of people who really get you, have lived similar experiences, have similar outlooks on life, if you're like me, you still don't necessarily feel like you fit in.
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I had no idea how much zing I'd get from the 'Yes, Ma'am' he gave me as I walked out of the room to use the washroom, instructing him that I expected him to be on his back and ready for me when I returned, despite his shaky limbs.
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Intimacy is incredibly difficult for me. Talking and socializing and revealing myself personally is much more intimate and vulnerable than sex is for me. I definitely need to feel like I have a social rapport before I have sex, but basically once I've established the other person I'm attracted to isn't a psycho, or a Republican, I'm good to go.
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One of the main things I'd been excited about exploring when we started our non-monogamy journey was my uncharted kinky side. Flick and I had done a small amount of experimenting over our relationship but it was limited in scope and hadn't happened for approximately a decade.
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If someone doesn't want me despite all those truths, it's not because I'm not _____ enough. It is because of his preconceived ideas of what he wants, not any failing on my part.
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I looked nervously around the room and then went with the only one I've got. I grabbed Will's face and kissed him. My stomach dropped in that wonderful little flip as his tongue slid into my mouth, and I knew we weren't going to have any troubles on the chemistry front.
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